Dear Younger Me

Since I started this blog, this subject has been on my heart. The song “Dear Younger Me” by Mercy Me has been playing every time I have gotten in my car the past two days. I started writing this blog about a month ago and every time that I would get in my car then, the song was on. The lyrics are very similar to  what I’ve wanted to share from my heart. I’ve ran from it and fought with myself about sharing it, but God keeps putting this song in front of me, so I feel like someone out there needs to hear the message so here it goes:

Dear Younger Me,

First of all, always remember that your worth is in Christ alone. It’s not found in the negative thoughts you think about yourself and definitely not in what others think and say about you. Matter of fact, do not let those voices keep you from living your greatest potential. Do not listen to the voices saying you can’t, you aren’t good enough, that no one cares about you, that you are unworthy; BECAUSE YOU ARE. I want you to love yourself, for you. Be and accept the beautiful person that God created you to be.

I’ve thought a lot if I could go back in time and change things, would I? Absolutely not, and I’ll tell you why. I am so much more grateful for what I have now because of the trials, hardships and hurt you are facing now. I know that seems silly, but you learn strength, perseverance, how to love, how it feels to fall, and how it feel when God lifts you up out of that pain through the trials you face now. The times that it seems you are at your end, you aren’t, you are far from it. The pain and disappointments you face now, you will look back at and laugh. They aren’t going to end your world, they aren’t going to even worry you tomorrow.

Even though you think you do, you don’t know what love means. First you will need to fall in love with God, and then He will send you the perfect man to fall in love with. Only then will you understand the true definition of love. My heart breaks just thinking about what I settled for in my youth because I did not think I could have anything better. Now, I look at my life and God has blessed me with a husband that I could only dream of as a teenager. I cherish my husband so much more because of the emotional and physical hurt that I experienced at such a tender age. Would I want to go through that hurt again, no, absolutely not, but I know I would never appreciate what I have now if not for my past.

Put more focus into a relationship with God than any other relationship in your life. When you put God first, everything else will fall right into place where it needs to be. I promise, this will make all the difference in your life.

Cherish the little moments and make memories with your family, because in the end they are the ones that will always be standing by your side. Friends come and go, but family is constant. One day you are going to wake up and realize that your parents are getting older, or that you wish you had more memories with your grandparents when they are gone and you can’t make more; so make them now.

Every choice you make, sets up your tomorrows. You may think it doesn’t but it will totally surprise you one day when you realize how much your life changed because of one simple decision. One day you will realize that the little, tiny, teensie weensie things that you choose day to day are all connected. The silliest things make the biggest difference in your life. Spend your days being a light for the Lord and show His love to everyone you meet. There is enough darkness in the world, use your platform to show others what God can do.

Tonight at church, our pastor shared a message about the crosses that we carried. Remember that when God gives you a trial, He’s been there before you. He knows your days, He knows what tomorrow holds, He knows how you feel. No matter how dark it gets, remember He’s there – you are not alone. He loves, cares and knows more about you than any one person on this earth ever will. You are His child, He set you apart, and He will guide your ways.

Now here I am at 25, I’ve faced challenges and heart aches I never imagined I would have to face. But, I’ve realized along the way that they are all a part of the beautiful life that God has chosen to give me. Every single second of what I went through before this moment, has molded me and shaped me into who I am today. Be grateful, even for the trials, be grateful.

Love,

Older Me

 

 

 

Do Something.

Have you ever just prayed A LOT for something to happen and then when God blesses you with it happening, you run from it?

I have earnestly prayed for months that God would open doors for our church to participate in mission trips and for me to personally get involved in those missions. I’ve grown up in church, and I served on many mission trips as a child with my mom. It’s a passion of mine and God gave me a heart that loves to serve others. I’ve talked to my family about missions and my husband has heard me say a million times how bad I want to go on another mission trip. A few weeks ago at church they announced our church would be doing a mission trip in Kentucky this summer. I was so ecstatic, then fear crept in. I was letting my flesh get in the way of what God had put in my heart.

I came up with all of the excuses in the book. I kept telling myself I was too busy or there was no way I could make it work. But in the back of my mind I kept feeling like I was just smacking God in the face. Here I was, blessed with the opportunity to serve after praying for months and I was just rejecting it. I’ve seriously struggled with this. I know they say that when you draw closer to God, the devil just attacks you more and that’s exactly what that mean old devil has been doing to me. He’s been attacking me from the inside out. He’s told me that I wasn’t good enough to go serve, he’s told me that I didn’t have enough time to go serve, and so on. And I believed him. So I just gave up on the whole mission trip idea, I was letting the devil steal this blessing.

Until Tuesday of this week the devil had control of this situation. I was driving home to get some lunch, and turned on the radio and started thinking about that mission trip again. Now this is a rare occurrence for me lately because I’m currently obsessed with Joey&Rory’s Hymns CD, it’s been on repeat non-stop. But, I hit the XM Radio Button in my car. I prayed and I said God, I need you to give me a sign that this is what you want me to do. That I’m not doing it because of fleshly reasons, that I’m not doing it so I can say look at me I went on a mission trip, but that I’m doing it because you placed this desire in my heart to show others your love. And like He always does, he gave me the sign I needed. The very next song that came on was Do Something by Matthew West. I have never in my life heard it before, but I sobbed and sobbed during it. Here’s the first part:

I woke up this morning
Saw a world full of trouble now
Thought, how’d we ever get so far down
How’s it ever gonna turn around
So I turned my eyes to Heaven
I thought, “God, why don’t You do something?”
Well, I just couldn’t bear the thought of
People living in poverty
Children sold into slavery
The thought disgusted me
So, I shook my fist at Heaven
Said, “God, why don’t You do something?”
He said, “I did, I created you”

Now, if that doesn’t send cold-chills down you, then I don’t know what will. The next part says:

If not us, then who
If not me and you
Right now, it’s time for us to do something
If not now, then when
Will we see an end
To all this pain
It’s not enough to do nothing
It’s time for us to do something

I’m so tired of talking
About how we are God’s hands and feet
But it’s easier to say than to be
Live like angels of apathy who tell ourselves
It’s alright, “somebody else will do something”
Well, I don’t know about you
But I’m sick and tired of life with no desire
I don’t want a flame, I want a fire
I wanna be the one who stands up and says,
“I’m gonna do something”

And that’s exactly what I am going to do, I’m going to be BOLD in my faith, step out of my comfort zone and DO SOMETHING for the Lord, because that’s what I’ve been called to do.

“Be strong and of a good courage, fear not, nor be afraid of them: for the Lord thy God, he it is that doth go with thee; he will not fail thee, nor forsake thee.” Deuteronomy 31:6 KJV